Facepunch Empire
| Facepunch Empire | |
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| Founding Date | 2011-01-01 |
| Member Count | 10 |
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| Allies | |
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The Facepunch Empire was a small dictatorship-type empire arising at the dawn of the third universe, and at one point the third most powerful entity in the galaxy.
History
Formation And Early Expansion
The Facepunch Empire was formed hours after the new universe arose on the 1st of January, 2011. It was initially led by Master Bob, with other initial citizens assisting in the construction of the capital. It took a while to construct this first city, but within a day it was constructing space-faring vessels. Initial exploration showed that the PTMC, a mighty empire at that time, was only a few systems core-ward. This limited serious expansion outwards, into mostly-undeveloped territory.
Some of the greatest cities of the Empire were founded at this time, among them Luaville, General Games Discusring, and New Snode. These were often separated by several unclaimed systems, however. In fact, this pattern of spotty development continued through the Empire's brief history.
Early War with the Nomads
Conflict came very early for the Facepunchers. 3 days after their formation, another empire under the banner of the Nomads attacked their home system, capturing several outlying cities. They then attempted to siege the capital for several hours before being forced out of the system. Raiding parties continued to attack the system for a few days. Though the cities were easily recaptured, this battle would touch off a war that continued throughout much of the Empire's history.
Continued Expansion and Conflict
The empire grew slowly, with many people focusing their efforts on a city or two rather then the surrounding systems. Still, the Empire reached a respectable size and TL7 after around a week or so of work. Sporadic contact with the Nomads was common. One raider had actually made his way to the capital and was attempting to escape after sabotage when he was shot down in his rocket. The first military star-ships were designed at this time. However, due to a lack of resources, the only ones economical were small 'runabouts', which could do little against opposing ships. Designs were in the works for larger cruisers at this point. This was vital, as the Nomads continued to raid Facepunch cities.
A worrying issue arose around this time, where many cities were being abandoned and left with 0 citizens. This was symptomatic of the disorganized nature of Facepunch colonization.
Some issues with accidental captures of single cities from the German Space Confederacy and United Communist Republics occurred around this time, though they caused few major issues.
The War Heats Up
On the 10th of January, the first major action of the Nomads since the assault on the capital occurred. A Nomad ship of 32,000 HP, a new-generation Mad Russian, appeared in the Luaville system, blowing previous estimates of Nomad ability out of the water. This ship was engaged by a cruiser captained by Lazers and driven off. However, Nomad forces successfully captured and held the main Cryozine production world of Zyneen at this time.
After his defeat, the captain of the ship, Evil Angelic, formed a privateer empire and vowed to continue to raid Facepunch space. During this time it was reported that he was a rogue agent and had been dismissed. It is unknown if this was truthful. It was suspicious, however, that Nomads and this privateer empire appeared to be working in unison. This suspicion was confirmed when the privateers officially re-joined the Nomads and lead an attack on the system of Jyol, which was easily recaptured after being left undefended. Adding to the confusion was a conflict between Evil Angelic, who was leading the fleet, and StickyNade, who was the political leader. StickyNade claimed they were simply fighting the New Densari Commonwealth, while Evil Angelic continued to make deep raids on Facepunch.
The emperor had gone inactive for a day at this time. Seizing the initiative, Canary formed an alliance between the Facepunchers and the New Densari Commonwealth. The NDC had reported Nomad raiding similar to the Facepunchers. The recently-chosen leader, CopperD, overruled the then-ruler CdrStalin and agreed to help wipe the Nomads out.
By the 11th of January, the emperor returned and Zyneen was recaptured. Research was poured into producing higher quality cryozine for warships. A joint NDC-Facepunch Fleet tore to Nomad space, capturing both their parasite cities and what cities they were leeching off. Nomad espionage was suspected, and immigration was set to request only. An issue arose, however. A route into central Nomad space was difficult to find, taking several hours and stopping the advance. Once this was established, however, the conquest resumed. By the end of the 11th, the fleet had reached the central cities. The Nomad leaders negotiated with Facepunch, but no compromise was made, and many were annoyed by their claim that the Facepunch only attacked 'when they were offline', which matched the Nomad's own tactics. The assault continued for several days afterwards, with bitter fighting on several planets. By this time, however, the Nomads had very little naval force apart from the Mad Russian, which appeared sporadically to harass the joint fleet. Pursuits of it usually ended in failure, as it was very fast. Eventually, the alliance captured Nomad cities and the capital, sabotaging their production and destroying all they could, leaving Nomad totally crippled. The war ended around the 14th of January after a lengthy siege of the capital.
The End
On the 20th of January, a still-unknown member of the empire attacked the PTMC fleet at Valhalla, sparking a series of events which would soon end the Facepunch Empire. On the 22nd, the PTMC responded (ignoring diplomatic efforts) and attacked the colony of New Snode. Apparently, they underestimated Facepunch capabilities as their TL7 cruiser was handily destroyed. The emperor issued an apology, which ended the first section of the conflict. By this time, the empire had risen to TL12, and was feeling confident. They began to spread their arms, capturing several inactive empires. A small incident occurred when a neutral transport belonging to Clan TP was destroyed upon suspicion of carrying troops to attack colonies. This was false, and unfortunately served to paint the Facepunch as violent and bloodthirsty.
On the 23rd of January, the truce with the PTMC was broken. A Facepunch player apparently 'spotted' a PTMC shuttle. All players had it appear on their HUD, and one sent it inquiringly to the PTMC. This was taken as evidence that the Facepunchers were still spying on the PTMC, and attacked, thus beginning the PTMC - Facepunch Empire War. The appearance of the spot message was the most troubling part of the entire debacle, causing widespread crackdown and speculation. One of the most popular theories was that a former enemy of the empire (perhaps Evil Angelic, as a similarly-named character was found in the roster soon after) had sent the message (either independently of or working with the PTMC) in order to rile up the war.
The main empire was totally absorbed by the end of January. The exodus attempt failed by the end of the next month, finally ending the short but eventful saga of the Empire.
Minor Events
Capture of Jyol
Early on the 3rd of January, a small colonization party entered the system of Jyol, not realizing it was already inhabited. Deciding to enter the habitable planet by orbital drop, they brought along space suits and rifles to defend themselves against animals. As they dropped into the cloud layer, they were shocked to see a city already there. They quickly captured the very basic city and took the system for themselves. Though the owner of the city was angered and threatened to lead an army against Facepunch, the capture provided the site for one of the Empire's crown jewels.
Founding of Emergency Manuvers
Another colonization voyage located a ringworld near colonized space a few days later. At this time, AI landings on ringworlds were broken, necessitating a manual descent. However, server issues arose, singling out the guidance systems. After fighting with the controls, the pilot (Master Bob) was able to regain control and dodge the ringworld. He then told everyone to jump out and orbital-drop in. Server issues arose once again, catapulting the astronauts into deep space. By killing the crew, they were re-berthed and another landing was attempted. For the third time, server issues struck and locked the ship into hurtling towards the sun, only relenting at the last possible moment. Finally, the ship made a crash landing (mostly due to the pilot's computer crashing) in the ocean of the ringworld. The survivors crawled out, swam to shore, and established the city of Emergency Maneuvers, earning themselves free beers at the galaxy's cantinas in the process.